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Week on the internet

WHILE YOU WERE OFFLINE: THE GEORGE R.R. MARTIN/TAYLOR SWIFT MASHUP OF YOUR DREAMS


IT WAS THE best of times and it was the worst of times when it came to the Internet this week. There were events proving that not only are people terrible (or, at the very least, lazy and motivated more by self-interest than anything else), but also that they could be kind and helpful and, sure, enjoy making parody videos and rushing to be first with the news despite not having all the facts. Whatever your take on the human condition, it’s almost certainly going to be both challenged and supported by the past seven days’ worth of world wide webbery. We’re so, so sorry. Or maybe you’re welcome.

Because Tumblr Demanded It, Even If It Didn’t Realize It

What Happened: Webmath 101: George R.R. Martin + Taylor Swift = Internet Gone Wild.
Where It Blew Up: Twitter, blogs, media think pieces
What Really Happened: Look, we might not understand why we’re getting a “Blank Space” parody video starring someone pretending to be George R.R. Martin right now—the original Taylor Swift video came out in November last year, and Game of Thronesis off the air until mid-April—but there’s absolutely no denying that the Internet is very happy that it happened. It was covered almost everywhere, with only the What If Wes Anderson Directed The X-Men?video coming anywhere close to that level of ubiquity. (Noreallythat was also everywhere.)
The Takeaway: All it needed was a couple of escaped llamas and a color-changing dress, and this would’ve been peak Internet right there. Wait, wait: What if we did a video that was Wes Anderson directing Taylor Swift in Game of Thrones? Somebody call our agent. Or maybe get us an agent first.

The Boy Who Facebooked Wolf

What Happened: A man told social media that he was being kidnapped as it was happening, and social media responded exactly as you’d hope. The problem was, he was lying.
Where It Blew Up: Facebook, Twitter, blogs, media think pieces
What Really Happened: Adam Hoover is a gay rights’ activist best known for creating what was called “the largest rally for marriage equality in the Midwest” at the age of 17—or, at least, that was what he was best known for, before this message appeared on his Facebook and Twitter feeds this week: “Please help me I’m in the trunk of my ford escort red 2000 gbh 2812. They said they are going to kill my family please call 911 I don’t want them to hear me. Please please call. I don’t want to die.”
Before too long, social media had mobilized in reaction; the hashtag #FindAdamHoover was all over Twitter, and Hoover was located by authorities safe and sound. Twitter was jubilant with the outcome:

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